Revisiting Our Existential Dread Before Tuesday
Did you know that there's an election next week?
Halloween was yesterday, but that doesn’t meant that the scary stuff is over. Election Day is Tuesday and with it comes a three-month marathon of court cases, misinformation, and uncertainty leading up to inauguration day or whatever is going to happen on January 20, 2025.
It’s a good time to check in on our existential dread and see how it’s doing. Maybe give it a treat and a belly rub.
I sit here today in the middle of October writing this piece, but I don’t think the timing matters much. In three weeks, when you read this, I imagine our national condition will likely be the same, if not slightly amplified. Each side is pretty dug in, leaving the undecideds wandering in this lonely no-man’s land of noise. I’ve seen more of a balance in yard signs this year than in the past, as well as more lawns sporting signs in general. My own lawn has a Harris sign, as well as one for our local Democratic congressional candidate. Last year, I had one for the Republican county executive candidate. I’m an issues voter; you could say that I vote for the wine, not the label.
Back in July, I told you to take a walk and tune it out, but it turns out escaping it is fucking impossible. As a weather obsessive, I’ve been watching Hurricane Milton coverage on The Weather Channel and they invited both presidential candidates to come on to discuss…I’m not sure what. Vice President Harris gave a message of safety. The former president didn’t respond to the request.
It’s gotten in the way of the routine. A friend of mine tried to go to her daughter’s volleyball match in early October, only to have all of the highways in their corner of Pennsylvania closed for a motorcade.
It’s easy to explain the inescapability of rallies and advertising: such a low percentage of the population votes that the major parties see a potential windfall if they can coax people out of their homes, farms, tents, nursing homes, and safe rooms, they could have a landslide. (Imagine if we were in a country with compulsory voting.)
But, it’s here. The election is right in front of us. So, what are we going to do about it? After all, one can only watch so many Moo Deng videos.
The existential dread is sort of like anticipatory grief but with a healthy dollop of fear. Anticipatory grief is where you prepare for the passing of a loved one by going through the grief process — denial, anger, depression, bargaining, acceptance — before they’ve died. It feels like we’ve been caught up in the loop of the middle three. Anger for so many reasons; the bombardment of messaging, distrust of both sides, confusion as to how one side could believe something, just for starters. Depression over our current state, where we can’t even go to a youth sporting event without the election complicating our lives. Bargaining, in the classic “I’m going to leave the country if X wins.”
Many won’t ever get to acceptance in 2024, mostly because there are too many people that didn’t get to acceptance in 2020.
The fear is electric. There’s a sign on the front lawn of a house that I pass when driving to my daughter’s school that says, “No Trump. No America. It’s that simple.” I don’t want to validate this feeling, as I’m not exactly sure what it means1 but it’s not the only time I’ve heard this sentiment. On the other side, there is Project 2025 and the suspicions that a Trump presidency will bring forth our worst selves without the firewalls that stopped disaster in the first term.
And, there’s the fear about what happens after Tuesday. And on the day that Congress certifies the election. And the days in between. I feel like it’s wrong to ignore that fact, what with the inescapable crush of media because of the election.
I’m going to quote extensively from Charlie Sykes, a former right-wing radio host turned Never Trumper. Sykes’ point is that Harris could take the minimum 270 electoral votes or hit a Reagan 1984 style home run and none of it would matter. His campaign has already filed more than 90 lawsuits to challenge state-level voting procedures.
But that’s not where the dread comes from, exclusively. It’s the unknown of what happens *if* all the projections come back with a Harris winning. From Sykes:
Desperation. Trump knows he may face prison if he loses. A desperate man is a dangerous man, and Trump is a man without scruples who has nothing to lose if he burns it all down.
His base absolutely expects him to win and will not accept the fact that he lost in a legitimate election. A Trump defeat will set off shockwaves of disbelief that he will ride into January — and beyond.
This time, Trump has the infrastructure in place, including an entire political party that has been conditioned to acquiesce in or actively support his complaints — no matter how full of shit.
Sykes cites a recent Gallup poll that should make any reasonable person vomit:
In 2016, 55% of Republicans had faith in the accuracy of election results. Today, it’s 28%.
46% of Republicans won’t accept the results if their candidate loses. 14% of them said they would “take action.”
Something called the Public Religion Research Institute released results of a survey that found 1 in 6 Americans supports political violence, including a quarter of Republicans.
And that’s where my existential dread becomes calcified. I sat in my home office on Jan. 6, 2021 watching the attack on the Capitol on one screen, while on a conference call with some colleagues in the D.C. area on another. The entire day was spent mouths agape. And, now we’re living at a point where it could/might happen again.
We’re going to live through a societal temper tantrum because one person has decided that if he doesn’t win, then it must have been fraud. As if there isn’t any other option. It’s a hope he has to cling to; in addition to being proven wrong, if he does lose, the federal charges aren’t going to disappear. The state charges will rage on. He could be sentenced to serve some level of time2.
So, as you read this on November 1 (or 2…maybe 3), 2024, I want you to know that there is strength in the numbers among us. Tuesday night is going to make for some uneventful television. Things are too close for us to learn much before midnight. Like 2020, it will drag on for a few days — Fox News’ Decision Desk leader thinks it will be Saturday again — and it’s not going to be fun. And, the ensuing weeks and months will see lawsuits stack up just like the last time.
And, there’s a lot of calendar between now and January 6, 2025, when the election results are certified. The two weeks between that day and the inauguration will be almost as long and unbearable.
Just like the last time I wrote about this, I want to offer that you’re not alone in feeling this way. This is all too important to tune it out completely, but make sure you vote and pay attention to the news. Do a meditation. Go to the gym. Play with a puppy. But, more importantly, recognize your existential dread as real. You’ll never be able to live with the anxiety that accompanies it until you see it and sit with it.
The election is important stuff, but so are you.
And, make sure you vote.
Final Thoughts on Finality
“It was natural and perhaps human that the privileged princes of these new economic dynasties, thirsting for power, reached out for control over government itself.”
— Franklin Delano Roosevelt at the 1936 Democratic National Convention
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I presume it’s anti-immigrant/migrant shit.
I don’t believe that the court system would sentence him, nor do I think his cases will survive a review by the Supreme Court. At best, he gets an ankle bracelet and gets home confinement.